Just now I ran across a funny question over at Yahoo! Answers on mathematical pick-up lines, and I decided to pick out a few favourites (taken from Y!A and elsewhere):
- My love for you is a monotonically increasing unbounded function. (I think in order to see this as funny you have to imagine somebody saying it with feeling.)
- Your beauty cannot be spanned by a finite basis of vectors.
- I don’t like my current girlfriend. Mind if I do a you-substitution?
- I wish I were your problem set, because then I’d be really hard, and you’d be doing me on the desk.
Also worthy of mention:
- Your lab bench, or mine?
- Your mama’s so fat she has a proper subgroup isomorphic to herself.
- I’m a fermata… hold me.
Last but not least, there is this gem:
A doctor, a lawyer and a mathematician are discussing the relative merits of having a wife or a mistress.
The lawyer says: “For sure a mistress is better. If you have a wife and want a divorce, it causes all sorts of legal problems.”
The doctor says: “It’s better to have a wife because the sense of security lowers your stress and is good for your health.”
The mathematician says: “You’re both wrong. It’s best to have both so that when the wife thinks you’re with the mistress and the mistress thinks you’re with your wife — you can do some mathematics.”